Newsgroups: sci.military.naval
From: baldwin@netcom.com (J.D. Baldwin)
Subject: Re: Got this great plan how to sink aircraft carriers cheaply
Date: Tue, 2 Jun 1998 16:09:14 GMT

In article <u2tRmwJj9GA.137@upnetnews05>, Dave Powell
<david_powell3006@msn.com> wrote:
> >It's a tossup, I agree. On ship, you have to watch your water usage,
> >I would imagine. In prison, you don't have to watch the water, but
> >just be careful when you pick up the soap. :)
>
> Which brings the question... do some crooks have the option, as in
> stories of old, of joining the navy instead of going to prison?

When I went in in 1978, I thought these stories were, at best, a
quaint relic of the past.  In Orlando, however, I met at least five of
my fellow recruits who claimed (credibly, I thought) to have been
given precisely this option in the form of a suspended sentence where
the judge announced (in open court, the stories went) that the
suspension would be vacated (legal-speak for "You go to jail now") in
one week unless the defendant saw fit to visit the local recruiter.

In one of my training classes, a CPO explained that enlisements
entered into under this sort of duress were invalid and that that sort
of thing isn't tolerated.  There was open laughter in the classroom,
and the instructor himself, I believe, chuckled along with us.

These guys were all, of course, from the Deep South -- I doubt I'd
have met as many -- or any at all -- if I'd opted to train in Great
Lakes, IL instead of Orlando (back then, we were given a choice).

> Any of them stay in?  Are Enlisted slots the only open jobs for those
> choosing the dress whites over the orange OJ/Ted Kazynski/Susan
> McDougal jumpsuit?

Well, of course this is done for relatively minor offenses (most
common, in my experience:  auto theft).  As for the big time names,
well, the military prefers to train its *own* psychos, I think.

Remember, as the Navy Personnel Manual itself says, "A personality
disorder in and of itself is no bar to military service."  Like they
need to tell *us*.
--
 From the catapult of J.D. Baldwin  |+| "If anyone disagrees with anything I
   _,_    Finger baldwin@netcom.com |+| say, I am quite prepared not only to
 _|70|___:::)=}-  for PGP public    |+| retract it, but also to deny under
 \      /         key information.  |+| oath that I ever said it." --T. Lehrer
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